Category: Random Thoughts

I wonder if duck presidents have a lame human administration period?

Which of these men is HnP improviser Joe Von Bokern and which is leader of the Brooklyn Newsies, Spot Conlon?

The world may never know.

I was wearing headphones at work today.

My co-worker said something and I thought he was addressing me.

Me: “What do you need?”

Co-worker: “Did you confuse your name with the hook from ‘Don’t Stop Believing’?”

I guess I’m self-centered?

Which of these men is improviser Jared Swiecicki and which is Horace Goodspeed of the Dharma Initiative? I couldn’t tell either.

Thunder… rats?

Thunder… bats?

Thunder… tats?

I hereby challenge Chicago-based comedy troupe, Octavarius, to a Fast Food Throwdown of epic cheese proportion. Friendly’s Restaurant Grilled Cheese BurgerMelt. No, your eyes do not deceive. That is a hamburger encased in TWO grilled cheese sandwiches.

Our friends Octavarius have a “Fast Food Quest,” whereby they find the most preposterous meal endorsed by human beings and embark on a pilgrimage to consume it.

As a native New Englander, Friendly’s is a neighborhood stable. The ridiculousness of the BurgerMelt, however, is not.

I proclaim three challenges to Octavarius:

1) Locate a Friendly’s Restaurant in the Midwest.

2) Consume the Grilled Cheese BurgerMelt.

3) Do not die when completing either Challenge #1 or Challenge #2

Also, I want photos.

I’ll be waiting. And also eating a spinach salad from Whole Foods because just typing this post makes me ache for an antacid.
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Note to self: Just because I wear reading glasses outside does not make them sunglasses. People can see me staring at them.

Someone somewhere once decided, “Hey, Spring Break Shark Attack sounds like a great plot to a movie.”

My film degree did not prepare me.