Surf’s Up…?

I’m a proud alumnus of the University of Colorado, an historic institution of higher learning (see? I said “an historic” just so I could show off how smart I am. Weee!) nestled at the foot of the Rocky Mountains. CU students enjoy skiing, mountain climbing, and eating organic produce grown by local farmers. During the Summer, you can hear the faint sounds of young people playing their mandolins on the wind…

…So you can imagine my shock this morning when I turned on ESPN only to hear that CU, which has long-been a member of the Big-12 Conference, is considering a move to the …Pac-10 Conference!?! Whaaaa?

What does that mean, you ask? Let’s examine the basic facts:

The Big-12 consists of Colorado, Nebraska, Oklahoma, Kansas, and other large rectangular entities full of wide open spaces. The mascots include Buffaloes, Cowboys, and Cornhuskers, to name a few.

The Pac-10 (Short for Pacific-10) is California, USC, UCLA, and other schools near the Pacific Ocean. The conference is home to, among others, the Cougars, Bears, and Wildcats.

I cannot advise against this move enough! Not only is the state of Colorado the entirely wrong geometric shape, but it’s simply nowhere near the Pacific Ocean! That, and it sounds like there might be a ton of dangerous wild animals running around over there. So no thanks, California! No. Thanks.

~JVB